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Being the Church

May 8, 2024 Abigail Sitterley

Photo taken at a Porchlight show in Rochester, NY

In addition to my full time job, I’ve moonlighted as a freelance writer for a variety of outlets. Most close to my heart is Renew the Arts, a Christian arts patronage nonprofit from Sugar Hill, Georgia. I’ve been connected to Renew the Arts for a few years now under the title of “Chief Storyteller.” In this capacity, I get to do what I love: telling stories of how God is working in the lives of his people to bring about shalom. These stories end up on the Renew the Arts blog, providing readers insight on what hosting a house concert looks like, what patronage means to artists, and how we can be the hands and feet of Christ in supporting artists and their craft.

For the April blog post, I interviewed Trailand Elztroth, a singer-songwriter from Mississippi who plays music full time and tours nationally on the Porchlight network.

There were more than a few great moments in my conversation with Trailand, but my favorite was his recollection of a show hosted by Pastor Garrett Soucy in rural Maine. Soucy and some of the other local pastors invited their congregations to gather together for Trailand’s performance, offering a connection point needed to bring together their communities.

“I think some of them had to have traveled to get there,” Trailand recalled. “The pastors are connected, but the people feel so distant. To see them pull together…the sense of community and fellowship I saw up there…It was such a good experience for me as an artist. They laughed at all my jokes and sang along. Afterward, they stacked like ten picnic tables in a long line and we just ate, drank, and had fun way into the night.”

https://renewthearts.org/behind-the-porchlight-trailand-eltzroth-shared-stories/

In his book Strange New World, Carl Trueman argues that the church's bears its best witness to the world when she is the bonafide church. Rather than expend energy squabbling in the culture wars, a more prophetic course of action sees us retrench in the very things that make the church the bride of Christ: obedience to the authority of Scripture, fervent prayer, the gathering of the saints, and the otherworldly nature of the sacraments.

Trueman states this succinctly in an article for Public Herald Magazine:

“It might sound trite, but a large part of the church’s witness to the world is simply being the church in worship. Paul himself comments that when an unbeliever accidentally turns up at a church service, he should be struck by the otherworldly holiness of what is going on. The most powerful witness to the gospel is the church herself, simply going about the business of worship. Many Christians talk of engaging the culture. In fact, the culture is most dramatically engaged by the church presenting it with another culture, another form of community, rooted in her liturgical worship practices and manifested in the loving community that exists both in and beyond the worship service. Many talk of the culture war between Christians and secularism…but perhaps ‘cultural protest’ is a way of better translating that [biblical] idea into modern idiom.…The church protests the wider culture by offering a true vision of what it means to be a human being made in the image of God.”

The church should be a Christ-adoring beacon, heralding the counter-cultural, upside-down Kingdom of God through means that both repulse and entice the world in their brazen holiness.

It's initiatives like the one these Maine pastors have taken that will, in Steve Taylor's words 'wow the deadness' in our churches and our society at large. Rooted in our liturgical worship and fortified by the Sunday morning gathering of the saints, our Christian witness should spill out in ‘cultural protests’ like hospitality and artistic engagement, demonstrations of a better story lived out through the pursuit of the Good, the True, and the Beautiful. Christians are inundated with theology resources and spiritual formation frameworks; we are weak in orthopraxy. We have abdicated our role as culture-defying agents of hospitality, the very characteristics of the early Church that mystified the surrounding Roman culture. Furthermore, our churches tend to be siloed, almost competitive, and we have lost the art of the potluck as a great unifier of villages and denominations.

The human need for community goes beyond church membership rolls. Opening our homes and churches to each other will not only create a bulwark against the anti-Christ messages of our day, but it will foster new opportunities for exhortation, encouragement, and communion as the body of Christ. Do the Lord's work: pass the mashed potatoes.

Gathering in and of itself is sweet fellowship but uniting to experience art together provides a new level of engagement. With the advent of streaming and digital downloads has come the commodification of music, which, in turn, has morphed its meaning from a shared world into a means of self-curation. I'm thinking, of course, of the playlist (as someone with over a dozen playlists bearing names such as 'songs for the end of the world' and 'late night work vibe,' I recognize I'm one to talk). As such, we are losing certain dimensions of the listener experience, including active listening, exposure to things we might not choose ourselves, and the unpredictability of live performance. Live musical performance itself has, in the same vein, also become commodified. We expect artists to play the hits, not their 'subpar' new stuff (though these will also be favorites of ours in three years), and to perform them just like they sound on the album. No creative license, please!

House shows decentralize the musical performance, demonstrating that audience resonance is a necessary component of the live experience. The chemistry between artist and listener, both in the midst of the performance and in conversations to follow, is life-giving and unrepeatable.

The more I work with Porchlight and trace the ripple effect of simple hospitality, the more I see this movement as a liturgy cultivator. Slowly, as most of God’s work seems to be, Porchlight is catalyzing the reintegration of hospitality as a thriving form of Christian witness. We have kept our doors shut for too long in spirits of fear, snobbery, sloth, and greed. Unity in celebration of the arts helps us turn the door handle again.

For those of us who struggle with evangelism and are concerned with how to best display Christian witness in a world increasingly hostile to it, take heart. Every day, the Lord uses our stories and our witness in ways we’ll never know. Step into community. Open your home. Give yourself away. Christ says you’ll find life more abundant than ever before.

NOTE: My conversation with Trailand included his story as an artist, the philosophy and theology behind his work, and his heart for the house concerts. Do dive into the full piece HERE. Also, new to the Renew the Arts blog this week is a conversation with Porchlight artist and host Steve Chab. In this piece, Steve describes house shows as “Thanksgiving with music” - that’s pretty spot on. Learn more about Steve and his commitment to fostering community in Pittsburgh HERE.

The Problem of Worship: Part One

April 15, 2024 Abigail Sitterley

I take book recommendations seriously, especially those from my favorite podcasters. When Parker Settecase of Parker’s Pensées recommended David Chalmers’ Reality+: Virtual Worlds and the Problems of Philosophy as a good introduction to simulation theory, I hit that ‘add to cart’ button real fast. 

My interest in the simulation hypothesis goes way back, thanks to a plethora of weird YouTube videos. When I was in college, I read the Upanishads and fixated on this phrase as a spiritual admission that we live in God’s dream - or maybe our own?: 

“We are like the spider.

We weave our life and then move along in it.

We are like the dreamer who dreams and then lives in the dream.”

We all have an innate sense that there is some design to this whole ‘reality’ thing. No matter how reality is defined, it seems we cannot escape the presence of a prime mover: a detached god, a frog-headed god, a simulator coding on a supercomputer. All our discoveries seem to have a shadow on them, a power watching from the corner. 


REALITY+

Reality+: Virtual Worlds and the Problems of Philosophy by David Chalmers argues that “virtual reality is genuine reality.” Yes, says Chalmers, a simulated world of our own creation is just as real as the experience of reality we are engaged in right now. I won’t, and can’t, faithfully regurgitate Chalmer’s positions for you, so I recommend perusing his landing page of books and articles on the subject. This book is mind-bending in the best ways and it’s taken me since January to get through a quarter of it. 

In chapter 7, entitled “Is God a hacker in the next universe up?”, Chalmers explains how simulation theory has shifted his belief in the probability of God. A self-described atheist, Chalmers resembles something of a deist or agnostic, open to the possibility of someone somewhere flipping the switches. The chapter is overall quite generous to the idea of intelligent design, positing for our imaginations the simulator as a woman conducting reality through a supercomputer. The conclusion, however, takes a rather fascinating turn:

And if she does, does she really deserve our worship? To paraphrase Len's personoid Adan 900: Any god that demands our worship doesn't deserve it.

Even if our simulator is a benevolent being, why should we worship her? She may be working to create as many worlds as possible with a sufficient balance of happiness over unhappiness in order to maximize the amount of happiness in the cosmos. If so, we might admire her and be thankful to her—but, again, there's no need for worship.

I find myself thinking that even if our simulator is our creator, is all-powerful, is all-knowing, and is all-good, I still don't think of her as a god. The reason is that the simulator is not worthy of worship. And to be a god in the genuine sense, one must be worthy of worship.

For me, this is helpful in understanding why I'm not religious and why I consider myself an atheist. It turns out that I'm open to the idea of a creator who is close to all-powerful, all-knowing, and all-good. I had once thought that this idea is inconsistent with a naturalistic view of the world, but the simulation idea makes it consistent. There remains a more fundamental reason for my atheism, however: I do not think any being is worthy of worship.

The point here goes beyond simulation. Even if the Abrahamic God exists, with all those godlike qualities of perfection, I will respect, admire, and even be in awe of him, but I won't feel bound to worship him. If Aslan, the lion-god of Narnia, exists as the embodiment of all goodness and wisdom, I won't feel bound to worship him. Being all-powerful, all-knowing, all-good, and entirely wise aren't sufficient reasons for worship. Generalizing the point, I don't think any qualities can make a being worthy of worship. As a result, we never have good reason to worship any being. No possible being is worthy of worship.

I'm sure many religious readers will disagree, but even they may agree that a mere simulator would not be worthy of worship-and therefore that a simulator is not a god in the full-blooded sense. If so, we can at least ask the question: What could make a being worthy of worship, and why?

These final paragraphs are so fascinating to me. Why not settle the chapter at, “We might be intelligently designed?” Why the rumination on worship? I’ve thought about this a lot over the past few weeks and have decided that the “problem of worship,” as I’ll call it, is a starting line to articulating complicated truths of the Christian faith. 



THE DEMAND

Let’s break down Chalmer’s conclusion line by line: 

And if she does, does she really deserve our worship? To paraphrase Len's personoid Adan 900: Any god that demands our worship doesn't deserve it.

Even if our simulator is a benevolent being, why should we worship her? She may be working to create as many worlds as possible with a sufficient balance of happiness over unhappiness in order to maximize the amount of happiness in the cosmos. If so, we might admire her and be thankful to her—but, again, there's no need for worship.

Does God demand our worship? Yes. 

This idea is like the sound of nails meeting a chalkboard at first. Who does God think He is to demand worship? At the outset, Chalmers makes a fair point. Anyone who demands our love for the sake of the demand meets appropriate refusal. "Um, no. That is not how love works," we'd say. This is not how worship works, either.

According to Scripture, we were created to worship God (Ecc. 12:13, Ps. 16, Ps. 119:14, Phil. 2:9-11). This is the highest purpose of the human soul. Assuming it’s true that God made us to be worshippers and worship is the thing we’ve been created to do– the uttermost zenith of all human enterprise –then it would be the best possible good for the highest demand on us to be the thing that we were created to be. 

Early Christians Worship in the Catacombs of Saint Calixtus / From image: "Fig 8: 'Divine Service in the Catacombs of St. Calixtus, A.D. 50."

As St. Augustine famously confessed, “Our hearts are restless until they rest in You.” If Christian anthropology is right, then complete fulfillment is manifested in our worship of God. 

Of course, “What are we created for?" is predicated upon the question "Who is the God who created us?" The purpose we've been given depends greatly on the personality, attributes, and motives of the god who fashioned us into worshippers.

We could look at this from the full spectrum of morality: If God is evil according to our general conception of evil, then yes, this demand might be twisted. But most don't consider the Judeo-Christian God evil, even if they have never read His scriptures or encountered Him personally. At worst he is irrelevant, at most he is restrictive and gives arbitrary, outdated rules.

If He is neutral, from the deist perspective-- not interested in human affairs and benign in His judgments of them-- then the demand for worship feels unbalanced. Why does He demand personal engagement when He Himself does not personally engage? Why does He require spiritual intimacy if the only intimacy He's interested in is vague weather control?

But as Francis Schaeffer insisted, we aren't dealing with an impersonal god. We are dealing with “The God Who Is There - and He is not silent.” 

Then, it behooves us to ask, who is this God? What is He like? What does He want? How can we know Him? 
These are dangerous questions. Asking them, we knock on the door of eternity. 

Sometimes we don't want the door to open. We'd rather pace on the front porch with our preconceptions of a vague, evil, or impersonal God than actually ask, seek, knock. I love the way Tim Keller phrases this: 

“Describe the God you've rejected. Describe the God you don't believe in. Maybe I don't believe that God either.” 

Reader, you not only have a personal invitation to ask, seek, and knock -- you have a guarantee along with it:

“Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and the one who seeks finds, and to the one who knocks it will be opened.” (Matthew 7:7-8) 



HAPPY, OR WHATEVER

Even if our simulator is a benevolent being, why should we worship her? She may be working to create as many worlds as possible with a sufficient balance of happiness over unhappiness in order to maximize the amount of happiness in the cosmos. If so, we might admire her and be thankful to her—but, again, there's no need for worship.

I agree. The invention, cultivation, and preservation of happiness are not enough. If personal happiness is the grand plan for the cosmos, it's a paltry mission, poorly executed at that. 

No serious ethicist or philosopher calls happiness the highest zenith of human good. Instead, meaning, agency, and human flourishing are the worthier pursuits. These things are more fulfilling alternatives to mere happiness and mood. We may worship our own happiness, but we know better than to trust in it. And if we don’t distrust our emotional whims, that's a matter of poor taste.

Would you give Norman Bates his happiness? I shudder to think what states of happiness occupy some personalities. 

We might be thankful for happiness, but we don't worship for happiness. Christians especially do not worship God for happiness. On the contrary, Christians worship God especially when they are not happy. Not even God tells us to worship Him solely because He lifts our moods!

Saint Job. Line engraving by L. Vorsterman after Sir P.P. Rubens. / Iconographic Collections

Consider these few Scriptures (I encourage you to experience their contexts):

“Then Job arose and tore his robe and shaved his head and fell on the ground and worshiped. And he said, ‘Naked I came from my mother's womb, and naked shall I return. The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord.’” (Job 1:20-21) 

“Though the fig tree should not blossom, nor fruit be on the vines, the produce of the olive fail and the fields yield no food, the flock be cut off from the fold and there be no herd in the stalls, yet I will rejoice in the Lord; I will take joy in the God of my salvation.” (Habbakuk 3:17-18)

"O God, you are my God; earnestly I seek you;
 my soul thirsts for you;
my flesh faints for you,
 as in a dry and weary land where there is no water.
So I have looked upon you in the sanctuary,
  beholding your power and glory.
Because your steadfast love is better than life,
   my lips will praise you.
So I will bless you as long as I live;
    in your name I will lift up my hands.” (Psalm 63:1-4)

Worship, despite state or circumstance, tends to make us not happy, but peaceful, contented, transcendent. The Westminster Confession of Faith says the chief end of man is to glorify God and enjoy Him forever. If we were created to glorify God, it makes sense that glorifying him and enjoying Him is our highest good. The God who is there invites deep intimacy. That, not happiness, is worthy of worship.

For those who grew up in Christian homes, worship may feel like a given. Sit through too many emotionally manipulating worship nights at Bible camp or youth group altar calls and worship can feel more like a rote performance than spiritual intimacy. We may see worship as something for us, dependent on our stylistic preferences and the feeling of transcendence afforded by a hive switch. 

The problem of worship, articulated well by Chalmers, can function as the stick of dynamite needed to turn over the calcified soil of our hearts. Ask yourself, “Why worship God?” and see what comes out of your heart. Then, go to the Scriptures, and ask the same. Let God teach you about what, and Who, you were made for.  

He is The God Who is There. Ask, seek, knock. 

30 in 30

November 1, 2023 Abigail Sitterley

Another five years around the sun done and done.

The older I get, the more I realize I still have so much to learn. And I love it. Humbly aware of my ignorance: this strikes me as a safe place to be.

At some point in the last five years, I fell in love with Dag Hammarskjøld's Markings, a series of personal reflections that the late Swedish diplomat never intended to publish. From existential ruminations to natural observations and spiritual contemplations, Hammarksjold's writing style is like a distilled diary: none of the fluff and, at times, scathingly honest. He's not afraid to critique himself, nor neglect the beauty of being a fallible human being.

Inspired, I began to jot down little lessons and ponderings as I found them. Some of these are included here, alongside other guidelines and truisms I've garnered through things like a global pandemic, professional opportunities, books and nature, national travels and inward journeys, expectations unfulfilled, and good and beautiful things, too.

Without further ado…

Here are some things I know about living life so far:

  1. Resist broad labels for complex issues, even if convenient.

  2. You have yet to discover all your heroes.

  3. Chumps go to Costco without a plan, but the wise go to Costco at 9:30 a.m. on Saturday mornings.

  4. Learn the art of not needing to have the last word.

  5. Anyone who says faith is a clear linear process and not a winding, arduous, unexpected journey is selling something. Anyone who's left their faith and believes they are now qualified to help you leave yours is selling something.

  6. Never underestimate the power of a snack, a nap, and a glass of water.

  7. You will die. This is not an excuse not to care for yourself. You will die. This is not an excuse to enslave yourself to the cult of wellness.

  8. The Diderot effect is real. Frugality is the spiritual cure. Take Paul seriously in 1 Thessalonians 4:11-12.

  9. When you go out, refrain from ordering meals or drinks that you could prepare at home. Make novelties novel again.

  10. Be careful with your own heart and others'. Be especially careful around those who aren't careful with their own.

  11. When you don't know what or how to pray, pray the prayers that God never says no to: a) “Humble me” b) “Cleanse my heart” c) “Make me more like Jesus.”

  12. Pray every time, over everything, that your spirit is prompted to.

  13. Wake up at the same time every day regardless of how late you went to bed. The human body has no concept of 'catch-up sleep.'

  14. Always pack an extra capo.

  15. Comfort zones are not static: the more you satisfy them, the more they shrink. Choose the uncomfortable. Keep pushing the boundaries of your little anxieties.

  16. Sabbath and rest are not optional.

  17. Don’t lose your desire to walk. You can walk your way into good ideas and out of bad ideas.

  18. Self-improvement books tell. Faerie tales show. Experience teaches.

  19. Followers of Jesus are known by their love for one another, not by their theological prowess. Following Jesus is nothing less than obedience.

  20. Humility, family, and locality are the best barriers to state propaganda.

  21. Inquiry and reflection are two of the best tools in your arsenal.

  22. It's better to help someone learn how to ask good questions than merely provide pat answers.

  23. Work with your mind? Rest with your hands. Work with your body? Rest with your mind.

  24. People are not backup plans.

  25. Resist the urge to react to every swing of the cultural pendulum. Chesterton was right: dead things go with the stream and only living things can go against it. But wise things navigate the stream.

  26. Know when to stop talking about your grief.

  27. In the multitude of counselors is wisdom, so seek out advice from others, but don't use counsel-seeking as an excuse to put off acting when you should act. Holiness is "…the power to act as we ought, to be response-able, able to respond with appropriate power to do what needs to be done when it needs to be done. The right thing at the right time." (Dallas Willard)

  28. Silence before God is more important than ambitious productivity.

  29. Occasionally, practice the discipline of not defending yourself.

  30. Invest more time in your family than you think you need to.

Better than Soma

March 19, 2021 Abigail Sitterley
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As I write, I’m about three quarters of the way through Aldous Huxley’s Brave New World…

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Defining Our Terms

February 10, 2021 Abigail Sitterley
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In conversation with my ideological opposites, I’m often struck by the flurry of our dialogue…

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Christmas, Here and Now

December 11, 2020 Abigail Sitterley

Say what you will, but A Muppet Christmas Carol is one of the best Christmas movies of all time…

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Create in Fear

October 27, 2020 Abigail Sitterley
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What would I create if I feared God more than I fear imperfection, imposter syndrome, failed innovation, or public approval?

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Phoebe Bridgers' "Punisher" and The Longing For Transcendence

July 24, 2020 Abigail Sitterley
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There tends to be a lot of pressure around an artists’ sophomore release…

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First Things First: Social Upheaval and The Great Commission

June 5, 2020 Abigail Sitterley
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I love that we Christians have such a passion for justice…

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Today's Cross

March 17, 2020 Abigail Sitterley
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Jesus, the same yesterday, today, and forever, bids all take up their cross and follow Him: in war-torn Germany and in pandemic-shaken USA…

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The End In Mind

January 11, 2020 Abigail Sitterley
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Last summer, I made an impulsive decision to buy tickets for the Greater Homeschool Convention here in Rochester…

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Reading Challenge 2019: Part Four

December 31, 2019 Abigail Sitterley
Reading the last few pages of Lilith by George MacDonald at Talisker Beach on the Isle of Skye. Brought it over the sea for this very moment. (copyright mine)

Reading the last few pages of Lilith by George MacDonald at Talisker Beach on the Isle of Skye. Brought it over the sea for this very moment. (copyright mine)

Here are my final ten reads of 2019…

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Reading Challenge 2019: Part Three

December 27, 2019 Abigail Sitterley
A small cafe’ and bookshop on the Isle of Skye. Bought a copy of William Hope Hodgson’s The Night Land thanks to a rousing endorsement by C. S. Lewis on the back cover. (copyright mine)

A small cafe’ and bookshop on the Isle of Skye. Bought a copy of William Hope Hodgson’s The Night Land thanks to a rousing endorsement by C. S. Lewis on the back cover. (copyright mine)

Part three of my 2019 Reading Challenge series…

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Reading Challenge 2019: Part Two

December 19, 2019 Abigail Sitterley
A lazy Sunday evening this past spring spent reading Duchovny’s “Miss Subways”

A lazy Sunday evening this past spring spent reading Duchovny’s “Miss Subways”

Let’s dive right in, shall we?

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Reading Challenge 2019: Part One

December 9, 2019 Abigail Sitterley
Leakey’s Bookshop, Inverness (copyright mine). Bought a lovely collection of George Herbert’s work selected by R. S. Thomas this spring.

Leakey’s Bookshop, Inverness (copyright mine). Bought a lovely collection of George Herbert’s work selected by R. S. Thomas this spring.

That’s another year done, another gone by. 2019: the decade’s final slice.

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Like Sands In The Hourglass...

August 26, 2019 Abigail Sitterley
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Annie Dillard once said that ‘how we spend our days, of course, is how we spend our lives’…

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25 in 25

September 19, 2018 Abigail Sitterley
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Just for kicks, here are 25 things I’ve learned in 25 years:

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willing one thing.

October 3, 2017 Abigail Sitterley
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If there’s one thing I retained from Sylvia Plath’s The Bell Jar …

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the shadow in my eye.

September 12, 2017 Abigail Sitterley
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Last night’s irresponsible combination of just a tad too much coffee and Guinness dragged me from yesterday into today with zero sleep.

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